tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-39696728226063646752024-03-15T10:21:12.427+03:00A Little Bit of Everything Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.comBlogger72125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-10401887878913084572016-04-27T01:26:00.002+03:002016-04-27T01:26:40.551+03:00Day 71: Caviar<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 71:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Caviar</span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqqSkKyE04-hhUTl5uHqcNrBNe0iqyZJFNRdnQrtAuwuK4Mrvkk7FPC2eE-SXzUlXGVbocvKcNel4eoqTcjIF6Hnj2xaCg9ug0YnpzZngbSX1n3E2JV-pKQ4C0H0OGzSklLfiG09HbiWxD/s1600/download.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqqSkKyE04-hhUTl5uHqcNrBNe0iqyZJFNRdnQrtAuwuK4Mrvkk7FPC2eE-SXzUlXGVbocvKcNel4eoqTcjIF6Hnj2xaCg9ug0YnpzZngbSX1n3E2JV-pKQ4C0H0OGzSklLfiG09HbiWxD/s320/download.png" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Done with all my relevant exams! Well everything medicine related. Basically consider myself done. So yeah I'm officially back for the fifth time now? I don't know I lost count th</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">e second time about half a year ago? Also lost track. Let's cut the introductions and let me cut straight to it. I have a "slight" change of opinion in something I feel I didn't do justice for. I complained a lot about university last time I posted. A bit expected considering I was walking into exams I was clueless about and that sort of fueled my anger. The most prestigious university in Sudan, feels like the most prestigious university in the nation. I offer my sincerest apologies for attacking it only because I'm academically lacking (something I was never used to) and to the fact I have a horrible batch (then again if you're reading this, you probably don't fall into the horrible category). Why the sudden change of opinion? Well, if you happen to live in the world's most notorious nation, you'd know that there was a bit of unrest about our wonderful government wanting to sell a 114 (I hope I got that number right) year old institute. Before I get into this, let me just state that I don't want to imply any political influence or message. The "Islamic" government is well, yeah you know. I don't like communists or communism, the idea is great but I don't think it can ever be put into practice, and whoever thought democracy is possible in this world is clearly too much of an optimist. So I really have no political views. So the reaction to the news, whether it was a rumor, or not, was the students (not on my campus, and particularly not in my faculty, medicine is sort of the disgrace of the university, nothing but people who want to do anything but study), break into protests, which as you probably know was violent with "officials". If you want to get the entire story it's all over social media. The few times anything broke out on my campus and I happened to be present, I decided to join. I don't know, it just felt like Ii had purpose, and a goal I wanted to accomplish, a sense of belonging to a family and community, even if it was at moments when we had a a pickup truck filled with riot police across the street from us. I still haven't been in a situation where there was tear gas or any violence at all (happens on the other main campus), I still felt something. I feel a bit out of words but I'm hoping what I'm saying is getting to you. I'll keep my 100th comeback short. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-7488150807786787102016-03-28T01:33:00.001+03:002016-04-27T01:27:41.015+03:00Day 70: Dirty Audio <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 70:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Dirty Audio </span></span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Not as consistent as I used to be. But consistent enough. I see quite a number of people have found out that I'm back to this, disappointing, yet exciting. Glad I don't have to do a year and a half of filling in like last time. This all feels a bit weird, that it's been well over a year and I'm keeping this somehow alive. At least I could stay committed somewhat to something in my life, and I'm glad it's not a person. Still feels a bit surreal. I was walking around high school in my tucked in shirt, skinny black jeans I always get shit from teachers for wearing, catching the bus after school, doing my homework, getting kicked out of class at times, ditching school at other days, coming back home to daily typing up how my day went, what was on my mind or what pissed me off. Now I have a DR (Dissecting Room) or some boring lab each morning, I get up on my own, without my mom waking me up, drive my own car to university, rush to catch the lecture cause if I miss one more than my attendance becomes too low and I won't be able to sit the exam. Stay in university until night time drowning in books because I've spent the first four months of the seme</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ster doing nothing and there's three weeks until the exam and I have to know the anatomy of the entire human body. Okay I'll stop. I mean if there's a point I'm trying to state, it's just look how quickly everything changed. I've been in university for a year and a half, yet I still feel like I started yesterday with the excitement and hunger of a freshman. I can even remember my first day in my new high school in year 10. Yet here I am, a semester away from exam that determines whether I'm basically done with a third of medical school, fucking hell. I mean I know this isn't a dramatic thing, but isn't it overwhelming? If you're reading this and you're in high school, tomorrow you'll wake up and find yourself a year into university. What about me? Will I wake up tomorrow and find myself a year away from finishing medicine? Unbelievable how time flies. Things have changed dramatically, remember how I used to claim I had two best friends and we were sort of a trio that could never be separated and were with each other everyday? One of them [(Lil Man) He's gonna laugh at his horrible name if he reads it should he remember he posted like four times] is in Eastern Europe and can speak a language that sounds like a scene from Taken now, and the other is in the States (Still in touch though of course). I'm in touch with maybe 4 or 5 girls from high school now, but other than that, all new friends, new people. Hell, this is a new life, one I'm still trying to get accustomed to. And while I'll constantly say take me back two years ago, it'll never happen. Just astonishing, especially if you take a moment to see where your life was two years ago, and where it is now. No complaints though, I'm grateful, and wherever I end up, I shall attempt to adapt (and most likely fail). With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-18385808601017315802016-03-23T00:02:00.002+03:002016-03-23T00:06:56.410+03:00Day 69: Machine Gun Funk <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 69:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Machine Gun Funk </span></span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I think I'm back. I don't know this is the best "comeback" line I could think of. Unbelievable that my last blog post was about year and a half ago. Unbelievable how ridiculous I think I sound as I read through all my old posts after all this time, as ridiculous as this one will look in a year and a half. Would it be funny to make a joke about this being day "69"? Sorry I had to. I have joined University of Khartoum, Faculty of Medicine: The most prestigious and sought for faculty in the nation. I've made my parents proud, passed first year (barely), not passing second year as of now but should be able to resurrect it in the next semester. I'm referred to as doctor by all my uncles and aunts, I know which nerve is most likely to be injured if you fall on the mid shaft of your humerus as well (Radial I think). I drive a brand new car with no keys. Life is perfect. Sounds like it at least. Should be if you're not the ungrateful bitch that I am. I'm not ungrateful though, and you never know the blessing you're in until you're not in it anymore. Perfect example would be high school. I loved it, and if you read back I openly stated that. When it was over I couldn't wait to start university. I got into the one I want(ed), studying the major I want(ed). Let me pause for a minute because I still haven't got used to typing again. University has deteriorated my English immensely. Used big words there to make it sound ironic. If people read my blog it was to hear me complain about the same things they complain about. I am about to begin. The most prestigious university in the nation doesn't feel so prestigious (to me at least). Most of the people in it seem to absolutely love it. I mean to be honest according to anyone in any other batch in all the other faculties I was fortunate enough to end up in what is the worst batch in the campus (I agree, but if you're reading this and you're in my batch you probably aren't one of the reasons). It's a nice place, with freedom educationally and politically. But it isn't what I vouched for in every way possible. The major problem is I feel like I can't be myself with the people around me (besides the squad). Everything I would usually say would be deemed inappropriate and unacceptable, I think the issue is there. Not to mention the things everyone does for fun are so unbelievably dull. We have a book club, one that people actually go to...I'm trying to clear this up in a way that doesn't make you think of me as some rebel that wants to come off as a bad ass. I actually feel anti social the moment I step into campus. I still can't get used to the fact that in I'm half way through second year, and there has been two gatherings that were outside university that involved both genders. TWO in a year and a half, that ended up with the guys sitting on one end and talking to each other and the girls sitting on the other. I actually feel anti social, something I haven't felt since I was the short Sudanese kid in fifth grade in a class full of racists Arabs. Educationally I'm struggling, because I need pressure to study. I have a mid and a final each semester, that I panic study one week before and end up failing. No assignments, nothing to make me feel like opening a book. As you can tell it's also not a party university (it's the exact damn opposite), so my DJ career has spiraled, I occasionally DJ but nowhere at the rate I did before. There's pluses. I've met some amazing people, I have an amazing new squad, having my own car is amazing. But the major aspects of my life, I just don't know what to feel about them. With all due respect, Fiasco out. (Feels weird saying that...) </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-71458526753983245412014-09-28T01:04:00.004+03:002014-09-28T01:04:31.459+03:00Day 68: Telemiscommunications<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 68:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Telemiscommunications </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjI8v2cKBb0eS_nxD2bDFx0CDOjD6atUl9DQgfOcuZgUGca_1Xsg0U22g2c4Om0tr8_73vbml1CuOK6PjQ53wvFmSW_6TmTUpBNbx-rh9mukngWc2Rt20G2a0HdaELM2mrLdtCZ3NTnqM1t/s1600/nothingmore_thumb%5B1%5D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjI8v2cKBb0eS_nxD2bDFx0CDOjD6atUl9DQgfOcuZgUGca_1Xsg0U22g2c4Om0tr8_73vbml1CuOK6PjQ53wvFmSW_6TmTUpBNbx-rh9mukngWc2Rt20G2a0HdaELM2mrLdtCZ3NTnqM1t/s1600/nothingmore_thumb%5B1%5D.jpg" height="320" style="cursor: move;" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Wow hasn't it been a while? Don't I disappear every year around this time? I won't say I'm back and all that, cause I'm sort of a bit disappointed that every time I blog, including today, I seem like an over dramatic 16 year old girl. But what's interesting about this blog, is I just scroll down and I relive the days starting from Year 10 up until the days of when I finished high school. Wow. This blog, has literally been through like 3 different relationships, over the past two years. Even looking forward to take in with me to university, making a part of two different educational systems. What a journey it has been. Okay let's skip me awing at all the "amazing" things about this blog and jump straight into the topic. So I have passed my IGCSE exams and thank God with results that made me, and my family proud. I have yet to get accepted into any university. So here's the catch about that. I want to join University of Khartoum, the most respected and prestigious university in Sudan without a doubt. Faculty of Medicine. Half the population wants to join as well and IGCSE students already have a tough enough time getting in. I won't get into the complicated application procedures which have been hassling for the past month, but just pray that I get in. So here's something I want to talk about relating to this. A lot of my friends are a year younger, and all of them complain about how it's mentally cracking them and all that. I was in the same position last year, and I get exactly the pressure each and every one of them is going through. I thought that it was the worst feeling in the world, going through the last year and the stress and exams and all that. But ever since my results, I've discovered a worst feeling, and sadly, it's one that has me going insane nearly every day. I wish I had to wake up at 7 AM everyday and get dressed, go to school half asleep, see my friends, and even the people I hate. I wish I sat in English class which lasted forever, and chemistry class which I fell asleep in. Went home and crashed from exhaustion, woke up and had to jump straight into piles of homework and study my ass off before I had to go to a night class. Text my friend about how I hate school and want the year to be over with. Cause you know what's the worst feeling? The fact that I wake up every afternoon, and have NOTHING to do other than occasionally hitting the gym and going out with my friends. There's no sense of purpose, no sense of direction. Everyday just feels pointless. I don't even know where I'm going to be in a couple of months. That ladies and gentleman, is the worst feeling ever. I can't wait to be complaining a month or two from now about how much I hate school or university or college or where ever I end up. Because many people do not understand how much of a blessing that is. Other than that it's still the usual, I am emotionally drowning, nothing worse than having butterflies in your stomach all day and being trapped within your own mind. DJ wise though, I have had gigs and still got a few more upcoming, so at least that's going well. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-74508771066070623932014-06-23T03:57:00.002+03:002014-06-23T04:07:14.644+03:00Day 67: Nineteen Eighty-Four <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 67:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Nineteen Eighty-Four </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh34izTnnU-fIG3z9lBHDOgoZHE3ogZpCmqAvIJnOyFV6twVaetmBoiBdo9JUtDw6GJ-j6sA1XXJgU7aweSDCaD3LfNTFSglCTbrAYSkux0ebU-s6o9EFQbtpmYrmF4PKbPxlaPSpUTSBxe/s1600/Eleanor-Roosevelt-quote.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh34izTnnU-fIG3z9lBHDOgoZHE3ogZpCmqAvIJnOyFV6twVaetmBoiBdo9JUtDw6GJ-j6sA1XXJgU7aweSDCaD3LfNTFSglCTbrAYSkux0ebU-s6o9EFQbtpmYrmF4PKbPxlaPSpUTSBxe/s1600/Eleanor-Roosevelt-quote.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Three more days and I'm gone. Not feeling great, A sore throat has decided to strike me on a horrible timing, and this might be the beginning of something worse (pray that it's not). I do not know what to expect from my little vacation. I also don't know how it's going to be. Add to the mix that I've gone a lot in the past years, I mean for the past three summers, it has been the same destination. I usually don't leave the capital, but this year it seems like that's going to change. Add to the mix I know a few people there so that might mean some more fun. However I'm also fasting and out and walking for the entire so that entirely kills me every day until it's time to break the fast. It also means that I cannot have a day which compares which may look of a scene of The Hangover movies (particularly the one where they go to Thailand). I understand that my blog has influence quite a number of people, as of lately a few people have actually told me that they want to change because they fall into what I describe as negatives on this blog. That somewhat puts a burden on my shoulders to be very careful about what I say. If I want to influence people, it is to make people better as individuals. I am far from perfect as an individual, I am not better than anyone. I have positives and negatives just like everyone does. None the less, I will still stand by previous and future statements, even though I understand they may contradict with what I believe are somewhat unfair social beliefs of this country. So in short, to those of you who strictly obey the rules forced upon us by this cruel society, which has a vague application of religion to culture, people like me will be the cancer of this society. No, I am not saying I will contradict my religion. Never. I am sinner, similar to all of you. However, I will contradict those who believe they have successfully mix religion and culture. I mean look at our country, arguably one of the poorest in the world. Why? Due to this vague understanding and attempt of an implication of religion. Should a proper Islamic community be established, then the community and nation will be one of the most successful in the world. That is my belief. Okay, let me not zone out into something above most of our understanding, including my own. I have seen people somewhat receive some stick for reasons possibly relating to a few of my posts. I mean I understand some people assume some things I write may be indirect attacks at people, and although they are not, that's something they can't understand. However, I don't think we are ever in a position to directly attack people through social networks, and it sort of bothered me seeing someone people for some reason have related my posts to being called names. Should my blog have had anything to do with it, and someone thinks that simply due to an assumption they have the right to judge someone, then I feel like I have indirectly influenced actions which I would never approve off. If there's anything I wanted to do, is to attack judgment on people, not influence it. We are all in no position to judge anyone, for we don't know there story, nor their intentions. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-12592069503543789542014-06-20T02:19:00.001+03:002014-06-20T02:19:44.151+03:00Day 66: Missing A Six<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 66:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Missing A Six </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwgn43xEa4wVjFCVQNbzC_NzhoJ3CxkV8wy3fSEf-P7DqO-zqrNygrD4L2c_IhB25X8SHEEUHxv0xgvfYeDWNmhrU3AmS9-_QF0kkfv-uyESrlLav7PAmgMK-IF23kEq6M7UAsbi2f21Cj/s1600/truly_asia.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwgn43xEa4wVjFCVQNbzC_NzhoJ3CxkV8wy3fSEf-P7DqO-zqrNygrD4L2c_IhB25X8SHEEUHxv0xgvfYeDWNmhrU3AmS9-_QF0kkfv-uyESrlLav7PAmgMK-IF23kEq6M7UAsbi2f21Cj/s1600/truly_asia.jpg" height="185" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Inconsistency should be my middle name. Apparently I have a few friends who get very agitated when I go a few days without blogging so sincerest apologies. It's just that to be honest, there is a lack of content, and also a lack of time management. Plus, I won't just blog anything, because I always strive to make my blogs top notch, different, and interesting. I don't copy anyone, and like to have my own style and way of doing things. So past three days, I've been attempting to build up an appetite but miserably been failing, my diet plan has spiraled because I can't find a balance to measure my weight and accordingly start my plan. I've also been accused of sub blogging (if such a thing exists). You see people really need to understand that I do not focus my blog on specific people, and they're generalized, however, I will admit that the actions of many of the people I know do influence the topics, but I don't just sit there and go like oh I don't like so and so, let me sit here and subliminally insult there ass. Nope, not how things happen. I'm not going to focus on that because I've explained that a million times, and this just made it a million and one. So, good news for me, I should be, hopefully, leaving this country within a week. Where am I going? The amazing concrete jungle, Kuala Lumpur. Just like last summer, it means I won't be blogging for nearly a month, but also similarly it means this is around the same topic. You see, for the past two years, every time I went, I was in a relationship. A few days into Malaysia, and they'd magically have a downfall and that would really kill the vacation, not when I'm out, but when you wake up and you start over thinking. Now, no straight up commitments. I'm sixteen, curios, and this seems perfectly set up to be a wild vacation. Hopefully, and please do pray that this vacation goes smoothly (not that the past ones haven't been smooth, but just smoother). Add to the mix that whenever I come back from vacations, I feel like a different person, like I feel more mature and changed (for the better). I keep in touch with everyone when I'm gone, but to be honest, I just feel like not even getting internet when I'm there, and just forgetting the world and enjoying myself. But, we all know that won't happen. So with all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-80424771497223152162014-06-16T18:06:00.002+03:002014-06-16T18:06:43.772+03:00Day 65: Daydream <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 65:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Daydream </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixd7WQyUGkZrjSAeai0rIOyi3xtmX4Yefmotri6bow7JttW_XImDBVtgNY4FG7SVfpGEFhFJxzqSVqGpNLdjSlu9HQKXcshmFF3YXGzZcvbxips1PUQ7QKmwzQ5QYBasxdDpw6jAg1DZvN/s1600/922.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixd7WQyUGkZrjSAeai0rIOyi3xtmX4Yefmotri6bow7JttW_XImDBVtgNY4FG7SVfpGEFhFJxzqSVqGpNLdjSlu9HQKXcshmFF3YXGzZcvbxips1PUQ7QKmwzQ5QYBasxdDpw6jAg1DZvN/s1600/922.png" height="242" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A perfect morning. Woke up after over sleeping which resulted in me getting all the rest I needed. Listening to some Lupe, and honestly this the perfect song to put me in a state of mind which I need, the lyrics are ironic to some extent, and the beat is sampled from a jazz song. Perfect. As for yesterday in what was a do or die situation, I am glad to inform you that I did. Regardless of what people thought about the party itself, the decision was unanimous that killed it. I feel like I've proved my point. I'm satisfied, so regardless of after today whether the gigs keep rolling in, or I'm staying home in my bed room, eyes closed, imagining a crowd of a 100,000 in front of me. As of yesterday, I have resorted out my priorities. With education on a pause at the moment considering its summer, I can focus on music and my friends. I won't lie, I can't hit it off with a girl to save my life, I mean I can try, but I would get rejected quicker than you can blink your eye, so fuck that shit, plus to be honest, I have sort of a commitment in my life at the moment (teaser because I'll never talk about that). But as of resorting out my priorities, I have a sense of stability in my life, something which I lacked for the previous years in my life. My priorities were completely wrong. I mean here's how it is: family, education (which now is vague up until university), friends, music, and then material things (which include guilty pleasures such as girls). Material things shouldn't even be there, but whatever, we all like material things, so I will not deny it. What I don't have time for is those high school 30 minute relationships with girls who are drama hungry, especially now and specifically for the past year where I have discovered what I want, and ironically it was standing right in front of me. It's quite ironic, I mean everything I hate she's not, but everything I like, she's not either, and even though that may seem a bit off, it's actually the perfect balance. So I'm done with all these fucked up commitments, and finally have a sense of direction regarding the whole matter. I feel sorry though, because I look at a lot of my close friends, and they're still indulging themselves in these loose ended commitments. But everyone reaches the point in there life where they meet that one person which completely changes there view on the emotional part of our lives, which is a major part, and that's a fact no matter how hard we deny, and how tough we think we are, we are all a sucker to our emotions. But I'm a sucker for the right person, and my eyes aren't blinded by emotions, ironically, my eyes are open because of them. With all due respect, Fiasco Out.</span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-84954689607092360472014-06-15T16:37:00.001+03:002014-06-15T16:37:59.187+03:00Day 64: Paging Dr. Satan <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 64:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Paging Dr. Satan </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjleL8PwgqIZMfjRgT72TZUedcSMAQjbA0mdUE5bUvKRfB_dnzK5NIQFA1bbnimTam-mVrujcwnT6kK7DI10SZ1HW-tT0M5mdd5hc65-aYL1nLonDr_9xkEMiR8O4DqlCRMxiuiVVXvcSl6/s1600/8542-o.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjleL8PwgqIZMfjRgT72TZUedcSMAQjbA0mdUE5bUvKRfB_dnzK5NIQFA1bbnimTam-mVrujcwnT6kK7DI10SZ1HW-tT0M5mdd5hc65-aYL1nLonDr_9xkEMiR8O4DqlCRMxiuiVVXvcSl6/s1600/8542-o.png" height="180" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My Library is prepared, BPM's re scanned (although that's pointless), the intro's for all the hottest afrobeat, dancehall, and hip hop songs ready. I honestly have never this prepared for a gig since my first gig, and that wouldn't even count because it was years back and I had no clue what I was doing. It's not due to lack of skill, but back then, I couldn't read the crowd, and know how to deal with any situations should they arise regardless of what they are. Those are things which come with experience. So why am I so prepared for tomorrow? Because this is the first party I have full control of since over a year ago. With my DJ reputations down the drain since I disappeared, this is my opportunity to step back into the spot light. It's a do or die situation. Dying is not an option, to be honest, I feel prepared. Let's just hope I don't jinks it. The venue is great, I mean, everything is in set for me to finally prove my point. Oh, and in case you know me, I know my gig is today but I typed that up last night so please excuse that. Alright, so I have a topic, because I am actually in the mood for a blog. I'm sorry for the repetitiveness but I personally feel this is an issue I should continuously address.The problem with us, as people today, is that we specialize more in judging the flaws of others, rather than ourselves. I'm not saying I'm not included, but then, some people take it to the next level. I usually always point out things wrong with our society and our people, claim I hate nothing more than hypocrisy, but at the same time, to some extent, I myself, I am judging people through this blog. But I only do it for the sake of people recognizing their flaws, and I tend to present it in an ironic, dramatic, and yet serious manner. See what Ii did there, about me being what I hate to some extent, that is recognizing your own flaws. I am acknowledging them. Because, I have literally seen this happen: A girl call another girl names cause she hangs out with guys. Yes, she has a few close friends who are guys, but in truth, the one pointing fingers hangs out with much more guys, and if according to her that's something worthy of being called names over, then she's the one who should be called what she's calling other people. So recognize your flaws, work on fixing them, and don't point fingers at people, I mean how hard could it be? With all due respect, Fiasco out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-13714445597220096742014-06-12T18:43:00.003+03:002014-06-12T18:43:34.599+03:00Day 63: A Tale of Two Cities <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 63:</span> <span style="color: blue;">A Tale of Two Cities </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs57hqc0XtCGvw8O9k7z7QjL9W8VJTePCFkz_fm8-fuMvGooGzoJjB7bL5nh2yWC35krqhjCGTJ3CXHvTEG-f44kqnQKiuzphx5GEBrZ1Cmq2xrpz5DZNEC5YVXojRuRy5mZK5N8u4eRbi/s1600/Quotes-on-success-List-of-top-35-success-quotes-14.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs57hqc0XtCGvw8O9k7z7QjL9W8VJTePCFkz_fm8-fuMvGooGzoJjB7bL5nh2yWC35krqhjCGTJ3CXHvTEG-f44kqnQKiuzphx5GEBrZ1Cmq2xrpz5DZNEC5YVXojRuRy5mZK5N8u4eRbi/s1600/Quotes-on-success-List-of-top-35-success-quotes-14.png" height="320" width="201" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I apologize for the inconsistency. Most of the times I do want to post, but my schedule is a bit tight. I'm not pretending to be busy, because to be honest, I barely have anything to do. I just wake up at 3 PM, have friends over or go out until about midnight, get back home, and just Skype with whoever is willing. Yesterday's day out was a bit interesting. Went to a party, pretty typical. At parties I'm just the person who's dancing whether the dance floor is full or not. Nothing really interesting there. What really made my night was a comment one my friends made. After the party, me and a couple of my closest friends decided to get some dinner. So were just sitting there, eating sandwiches, on the street, and I'm sipping on a strawberry smoothie. Were all talking about went well and what didn't at the party. So basically, I was like "Guys, I feel like blogging". Then they started making fun of me (which is pretty much us 24/7). They threw some comments about how I'm like the girl from Awkward (that completely pointless and over dramatic show on MTV). Pretty much it was something like: "If one thing goes wrong in your day, you over exaggerate it, blog it, and for some reason everyone reads it." While I am quite disappointed that I am being compared to some over dramatic teenage girl, it works for me, and regardless of what it is. I find pleasure in entertaining people, even if it means me revealing personal stuff at times. I am somewhat an entertainer my nature. I enjoy being behind a deck and rocking a party. I enjoy entertaining. Sort of brings a satisfying feeling to me. I will spare you of the controversy today. I may have not been hitting it off with women at all nowadays (long story short, if a girl doesn't hate me, she basically rejects my ass). But I have a couple of gigs in the next week. Feeling excited, particularly about one, because I'm almost sure it'll be massive, so this is an opportunity to finally demonstrate a complete year of occasional bedroom practice, and hopefully finally prove myself and cement myself as one of the top DJ's in this country. Plus, most DJ's start my age, and don't find success until their early 20's (spoke to one yesterday). Going to keep it short, sorry for no rants today, it's coming soon I promise. With all due respect, Fiasco Out.</span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-83088961298454951982014-06-10T23:39:00.001+03:002014-06-10T23:39:11.191+03:00Day 62: Because of Winn-Dixie<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 62:</span><span style="color: blue;"> Because of Winn-Dixie </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKsoVUpIM9cIAhjHU63aZNfaQjPKbz1Wiv0F4stc7uhp8j1CWZU5ftaQmaugnsyDEJOk0leUALCr4_UYPsP92baOqCQGpKWHUNG14mpspBqtkCqeJavcGwnYhZD0TsVZyX9nIgdb_DNNaY/s1600/tumblr_m9m4a9jYIk1r9kkseo1_1280.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKsoVUpIM9cIAhjHU63aZNfaQjPKbz1Wiv0F4stc7uhp8j1CWZU5ftaQmaugnsyDEJOk0leUALCr4_UYPsP92baOqCQGpKWHUNG14mpspBqtkCqeJavcGwnYhZD0TsVZyX9nIgdb_DNNaY/s1600/tumblr_m9m4a9jYIk1r9kkseo1_1280.jpg" height="158" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There's different ways to do things. One could back flip into a pool, or use the stairs to get in. I prefer to be and like to think I'm the kind of person who's doing back flips into the pool. How? By being reckless (I once actually played Wii without the safety strap on). As of lately, I've somewhat raised a few eyebrows due to the content of my blog. I mean, subliminally motivating the youth to be reckless through doing things socially unaccepted and raising the middle finger to everyone who disagrees (raising it with all due respect of course). People are not happy. Especially coming from a guy who does not even do a single thing he subliminally motivates people to do. The truth is, I am not motivating anyone to do anything. I am simply stating the factors people should not be judged for. Yes, culturally, socially, and most importantly religiously, things a few posts ago I said people should not be judged for are incorrect. But I do not believe that defines them as a person, and I will stand by that. So if they're a good person, towards me and other people, I got no problem them. Regardless of they're age, gender, or race. Middle finger up to anyone who judges them. I have been made aware the this is the sort of content which may potentially hurt a few feelings. So I'd just like to apologi...no, get lost. Accept it, to you, people like me are the disease of this society, but I'll always be here typing up my opinions whether correct or not regardless of what you think or believe. Okay, I have one more "as of lately". So, as of lately, I've actually received a lot of positive feedback on my blog, people telling me they love it, and agree with me. Well thank you, I honestly try my best. It feels nice having my efforts recognized. I mean, today, there is sort of a lack of content. People are always like looking forward to see what my next post is. Mostly because they are excited about what the next controversy. The pressure is on, now I have to keep my posts constantly interesting, even though I have absolutely nothing going other than occasional and very rare outbreaks of drama which barely last. Plus, I've hit about almost every controversial topic. But I actually have one slightly controversial. Have you ever seen those people social networking sites (specifically Twitter) who preach something and then have actions which completely contradict with there posts. Like for example, I see all these guys that tweet religiously, and obviously want to be viewed as religious people, yet contradict with what they post by constantly interacting with females in a non religiously friendly way (add to the mix if you're pretending to be some scholar you should not be interacting with them at all), and even take occasional bashes at them (not like I do that) although as religious people they should not do that. I know I constantly bemoan judging, but I am judging these people, yet I will not call them hypocrites, because I am not above them to judge them, nor do I know their intention. Yet I claim I'm not one because I don't judge people for my sake, I judge them for the entertainment of your controversy seeking mind. On that second bombshell of me being for the first time approaching the doorsteps of what I hate if not completely entering its premises, and with all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-84657410125349815072014-06-08T20:26:00.000+03:002014-06-08T20:26:06.419+03:00Day 61: My Pet Coelacanth<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 61:</span> <span style="color: blue;">My Pet Coelacanth </span></span></h2>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia_SjpBPAXxOz4wpErNPWBiSaQrCfPQJ2vq1T4ofQCEYETPweTVS1NaHT0TLwHKqe5E3k0O6jgyfj1dMDgCBgxum4CNZOb6Bv-hbPWZ4C3wZVshFhycwXcpMcWrmcfaLh9hhOCmJ6PxXbO/s1600/1ef9ae65214e76b5b160724705e08b4a.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia_SjpBPAXxOz4wpErNPWBiSaQrCfPQJ2vq1T4ofQCEYETPweTVS1NaHT0TLwHKqe5E3k0O6jgyfj1dMDgCBgxum4CNZOb6Bv-hbPWZ4C3wZVshFhycwXcpMcWrmcfaLh9hhOCmJ6PxXbO/s1600/1ef9ae65214e76b5b160724705e08b4a.jpg" height="303" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well don't we have a lot in store for today? Yes, quite a lot of things from your favorite controversial socially awkward yet somewhat accepted kid from down the street. Okay, no boring introductions on education or music. Today has been quite the day so far. To begin with, I woke up quite late, and first thing I did was check my phone. A text from a friend who's older telling me about how he really enjoys my blog, and probably as of lately it's gotten much better (hell yeah it has). But then, at the same time, other people were somewhat not very happy about my content, saying I use this blog to disrespect people. Add to that me being hypocritical by being the one with the mentality which I constantly bemoan and claim I hate. Understandable opinions. I mean okay, I'm disrespectful, won't deny that, and the signing off with the "all due respect" is supposed to be ironic. I bash at all functional parts of our society. Regardless of where you stand, I'm bound to insult your lifestyle using a few middle school English cliche statements. Am I a hypocrite though? Do I have the mentality which I constantly bemoan. Well again, judging myself would make it really inaccurate. So let's do a breakdown (yay!). What do I have in common with this mentality? I actually am very common to it when you think of it. I judge and analyze almost everyone and use it on blog posts to get views and satisfy my readers. One day I'll be praising a lifestyle, the next I'll be insulting it. So what makes me different? My intentions. I couldn't care less about people's lifestyles in real life, it's only in this blog to express my opinion. It's only here where I turn into your 15 year old girl on her period and rant about relevant topics. But then in person, I'm far from that (or at least I like to think so). The real problem though, was that yesterday I decided to relate my generalized topic to a personal experience, and then stated it was a cheap shot. That was to add effect, and honestly, it was not offensive (and that's just not my opinion, but almost everyone in a neutral perspective). I mean I simply stated what happened (from my side of course). So you find me offensive? Well I find you offensive for finding me offensive (what?). So even though I've stated a billion times, I'll do it again. I do not target specific people, or groups, I target everyone. I will occasionally relate topics to personal experiences, regardless of whether it involves people or not. Not offensively, its simply relating. If you find me offensive, either do not read my blog, or tone down the sensitivity and laugh at the irony of my situation, and your situation. Conclusion, this blog contains derogatory terms, nostalgia, controversy, cheap shots (which aren't really shots at all), and bashes to your society and lifestyles. But of course, it contains them, with the utmost respect. So on that bombshell, and with all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-41177005393913064952014-06-08T02:13:00.002+03:002014-06-21T08:40:27.860+03:00Day 60: The Road To Indiana <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 60:</span> <span style="color: blue;">The Road To Indiana </span></span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A long day. But then, since when are days not long? As of lately, personally, I've been feeling improvement, like for the past few days, to be honest, my mood, has been improving. Simply cause I'm not letting external factors effect me. Focusing on music, and just viewing life positively. I mean to be honest, I've got to throw some of the credit to my friends. I mean honestly got a lot of friends who were there for me. One has specifically gotten a lot of trouble lately, but chooses to stick around. False accusations and all, but to be honest, regardless of the accusations and situation, I'd never ditch her. Why? Cause to be honest, a few posts ago, I hit that low point of my life where everything comes crashing down. To be honest, she was there for me. She never even said that she'd be there for me, no, it's not about that. Her actions showed it, not her words. She did subconsciously. How? Through simply being a good friend. She never asked what's wrong, or if I'd like to talk about it. She was the positive vibe, simply through constantly being with me. That's what I needed. Not a bunch of empty promises about how you'll always be here for me, or you'll never leave (they've become way to cliche). All my friends, shout out to you. Okay, controversial debate time? Or should I just sit this day out? I'll sit it out and go for something a bit more calm and flows easily. To be honest, I have content which I can talk about, I just wouldn't, too controversial, and I'm not really feeling it cause it involves me and other people, and I don't like other people. But here's a relate able thing which I hope isn't controversial. I have commitments. So let me use a nice mix of past experiences to explain why relationships are shit. Okay, here's the catch, I know one girl who I could definitely keep a relationship hopefully until like forever with. Physically though, we can't be together (distance is a bitch). But then I doubt I could and I didn't with any other girl in the past. I choose to blame the mentality of this country. I mean breakups over you supposedly dancing with another girl (even though it doesn't happen [uncalled for cheap shot]). Expectations on you being someone that you're not (like some Prince Charming), all are factors which in this place, make it impossible. Plus, women in general (yes, I'm playing the sexist card) forget every good thing that you've ever done and just highlight the bad. So yes, we all do bad stuff, mistakes, but even though your good actions always out weigh them, in this place, it's a legitimate reason to cause things to come crashing down. Which is why, at this moment, and this horrible country, I think they're shit. Ironically, the one girl who I feel I could keep kicking it with forever never lived here, and that's a major reason in my assumption. Frankly though, this post was useless, just like I am, and just like my life is, and was. Oh, and if you're reading this early, I'll have the cheesy quote up by tomorrow. So, with all due respect. Fiasco Out.</span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-74271042642542084802014-06-06T22:07:00.000+03:002014-06-06T22:07:03.701+03:00Day 59: Eminado<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 59:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Eminado </span></span></h2>
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<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYZwdMoQwtaxmUHTf4QHc1WRj8D1mEFV630sKsNZMMN-j43R-tlZ3WQ3jWDA_B2_sS8xIWPjDHrD7pqiVDa68iWdI7TD7iDyKtGPYCTxzwtZ57i3zcHeVWNZiPt_fdQ4EcXJdVUnIgNk_b/s1600/951.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYZwdMoQwtaxmUHTf4QHc1WRj8D1mEFV630sKsNZMMN-j43R-tlZ3WQ3jWDA_B2_sS8xIWPjDHrD7pqiVDa68iWdI7TD7iDyKtGPYCTxzwtZ57i3zcHeVWNZiPt_fdQ4EcXJdVUnIgNk_b/s1600/951.png" height="242" width="320" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;">"Yes ladies and gentleman, this is how cheesy I've gotten"</td></tr>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Blogging weather. I don't know if that's even a term, but at the moment, there's a massive sandstorm, and every now and then massive showers of rain. I've gotten lots of positive feedback for yesterday's post, and everyone who read it seems to agree. Glad to see some people are actually on the same side with my always controversial theories. Another one today? Nah. I don't even know what I'm going to talk about, I never do, I simply, just let my fingers connect, and whatever spills out, does. The thing is, most people assume in some of my posts, I single out groups, or specific people, but for the millionth time, I don't. If I have a problem with someone, I don't blog it, and if I do, I specifically say that this is directed to a specific person. Yesterday, it was a theory I thought of, and then I did use an example concerning my friend. However if at any time you felt that a part of it was directed to you, then you feel guilty. It's your subconscious or even your conscious side telling you this somewhat applies to you. If it does, and it's something positive, awesome. If it's not something positive, then either I disagree with something regarding you, and whether you want to change it, or not, that's your opinion and problem, not mine. I mean I get to many of the people who personally know me and read the blog telling me "I know who you meant by that". I didn't mean anyone, and understand I'm not 12 years old to specifically address someone through my blog. Okay? Cool. As of recently, I've stopped socializing. Not because I'm antisocial, but because I have no tolerance for drama. In my opinion, 4 quarters are more valuable then 40 pennies. I'd rather have a few really good friends, then ten times the amount of friends who aren't worth anything. Plus, maybe the reason I've stopped socializing is cause I've had that drop in everything, and that includes connections with most people. Simply cause, none of them care enough to have the effort to stick around when I need them the most. Sort of the same situation as always. "You know I'm here for you if you ever need it, or ever need somebody to talk to." Yes, perfect, found the topic for today. That line. How many people have ever said it to you? A lot. It's a lot easier said then done. People tend to say it a lot. The thought is nice, but then, no one ever actually pulls through with it. Like just cause you said that to me, I'm not going to run to you, and be like be here for me. No, wrong concept. If you want to be here for me, show it. Simple as that. I feel like I'm ranting and will lose my point soon. Not that I've even made one, but then, sort of what makes my blog unique, endless arguments with no points or purpose, just like my life. With all due respect (as always), Fiasco Out.</span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-59806296264542035902014-06-05T17:27:00.002+03:002014-06-05T17:27:22.409+03:00Day 58: At Dawn We Rage<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I haven't blogged in a while however for the past few days I have been quite under the weather, I had a flu and then the day I recovered, food poisoning struck. Well I feel like I'm back on my feet. Fatigue sort of faded and now I'm feeling great. Well it's summer. But along with summer comes a lack of purpose and direction. Here's the difference between this summer and all the previous ones. Every summer, you possibly join summer night classes, or at least that was the case for me last summer. You know where your headed to, and that's obviously the next school year after the vacation is done. Well, this year, I don't know where I'm headed and won't know until August when the results are out. Not to mention I still haven't applied for a single university or college. Add to the mix I'm starting to doubt going for medicine (even though I know that's almost definitely the career path I'm taking). It's appealing cause I'm good at it, and it'll offer me satisfaction especially considering I'm helping people. It's not appealing because, it takes forever to get down, and forever to get a decent paying job, experience, and reputation. Add to the mix being a DJ is not option (sadly). Hoping it'll all sort out when my results coming. I'm just hoping my results are pretty good. I actually have an interesting theory that I'd like to share. So high school is over. Looking back, I sort of realized a few misconceptions. Where I'm from, culturally, religiously, and socially, drinking and smoking (and I don't mean cigarettes) are sort of looked down upon. For guys, and this is cause of the social inequality (if that's the correct terminology) present in this country, if you do any of those things, it's not a big deal. But if a girl does it, she's automatically gets called by people who don't know much about her a slut, hoe, or whatever. But what I've realized, is that, its actually sort of opposite, in both cases. Personally, I find guys who smoke weed quite obnoxious, sort of because 75% of conversations with them are about they're smoking experiences. "Dude once, I got so high"...no, shut the hell up, I couldn't care less. As for drinking, same issue. Nothing is worse than drunk guys. Especially in a country where 90% of the guys think the chicks will think it's hot to overdo how drunk you are and act wasted and go all crazy and claim they can't control themselves. That just makes them annoying and obnoxious. But for girls, here's why I think it's the opposite. Girls don't enjoy talking about they're getting high experiences. Like she's basically the same around you. When she's drunk, I mean its all fun and games until one of her friends who's wasted starts crying and the scene turns horribly lame and repetitive considered it happens nearly every time. Now you would think, that would make them more annoying then your "straight edge" girls here. But here's the twist, girls here who don't associate themselves with stuff are usually judgmental, and close minded. Of course, this doesn't apply to everyone, but to be honest, it applies to a fair share of people. I hang out with a lot of girls, and the amount of girls I've seen call other girls slut simply cause they have a different lifestyle is unbelievable. Not to mention, these girls are usually quite boring, and not even social. I mean recently I've heard that, I've seen a friend of mine judged simply cause she's grown close to me (even though this irrelevant but it's the same the concept). </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I understand a fair amount of females read my blog, so with all my heart, if you can remember once calling a girl a slut or hoe for smoking or drinking something, or even something as simple as hanging out with guys, fuck you for believing everyone should be like you and not being like you makes them bad. But of course, fuck you, with all due respect! Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-13310458850545943002014-05-31T16:52:00.002+03:002014-05-31T16:52:29.793+03:00Day 57: Pinkville <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Apologies for the completely irrelevant post yesterday. I had not realized how irrelevant it was until today. Well, not like I can delete it. To be honest it's probably the lack of topics. I mean usually and before I took my 6 month or so break from this blog, I had plenty to talk about, and even more people reading my blog. So technically, the lack of topics isn't from lack of a social life (even though I claim I avoid everyone, I still have; more like had; emphasis on the past tense) enough going in my life to actually have a decent blog. Well I do at the moment. Basically, and this is something only people who are doing their IG exams at the moment can relate, IG's sort of mostly kill your social life. But now that they're on the verge of finishing, and I only have a paper left, I'm basically done, so I'm somewhat slowly regaining my social life. That's repetitive and I know I've said that a lot throughout my posts. So, let's switch it up. For me, things have been slightly different, especially regarding people. I usually get second thoughts about posting things like this, but I mean, you want to read this, and I honestly want to get it out of my head. When you're with someone for quite a while, things start changing. Not for the better, but also not for the worse. There's just a change. Constant situations bring about this change, cause the more time you and a specific person spend together, the more situations you go through, good or bad. I'm basically elaborating and paraphrasing the saying which talks about obstacles and you deciding whether you let something make you stronger or not, and then applying it to your friendship or relationship with someone. By situations, I also mean day to day things. Well as for me, I don't like the change. I understand I equally contribute to it, but it's just because as a person, that's how I am. For a very long time, I'll be on my very best behavior, but unfortunately that leads to people being to dependent and complacent with me. When I suddenly fall out to see how much the other person is willing to do the same for me, I am usually quite disappointed. This inevitably leads to me suddenly inputting effort on a much a lower basis as I am quite disappointed which then leads to everything falling apart. So to some extent, I have to blame myself for being on full gear on day one, and then the moment I'm gassed out, or life decides to bring me down, I expect someone who has never kicked things into full gear for me, to suddenly somehow magically get the will power to do it. So basically, this is sort of the reason, nothing ever works with me. It's the reason why I don't have too many friends, cause to be honest, there were only a few people who could notice when I gas myself out and then help me out. Furthermore, its the reason why relationships were never quite the thing with me, and to be honest, until I mature enough, or find someone who can pick up the signs easily and pick up the pace when I'm slowing down, they honestly will never be. It's the reason why educationally, sometimes I'm excelling, but at this moment (and thank God it happened to be at a timing where I only have one paper left) I'm gassed out. Don't get me wrong, mentally I have lots of stamina, but I'm not a machine, so I'm bound to suddenly face a drop at one point. These days, I've reached that point. This is the point where I feel like everything is bound to go wrong, cause I'm too fatigued to make things right, and to be honest, most people who have anything to do with me probably don't even notice it to making things right. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-25836377717782081772014-05-31T00:40:00.003+03:002014-05-31T00:40:37.044+03:00Day 56: Iron Curtain<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOPXQRKyDXlXC9kiJA6YbmQo0XPRTsjirl94V1edGBpKdQefOZnQV_PAor3Uze45FFpuWDredaR9_sVW_nNxfYb3HjZul31x2E4eN1vjADwaNFqeEzrW96QDAAEsF15iFA7k4Bc1VlM5Z2/s1600/change+quotes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOPXQRKyDXlXC9kiJA6YbmQo0XPRTsjirl94V1edGBpKdQefOZnQV_PAor3Uze45FFpuWDredaR9_sVW_nNxfYb3HjZul31x2E4eN1vjADwaNFqeEzrW96QDAAEsF15iFA7k4Bc1VlM5Z2/s1600/change+quotes.jpg" height="215" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Fashionably late, so you know things are back to the way they were. Yesterday, was a sleepless night. Well, not really, basically I got something of about 3 hours of sleep. Not like I was studying. Just laying down, thinking. Horrible thoughts, I actually considered quitting DJ'ing. Like my good days were over. Year 10, I really hit it off, parties on a weekly basis, 2 or even 3 in a week at once. But then deciding to put everything on hold totally killed me off. Plus, even though I've sold out and decided to play music I might not approve of in order to please the audience, I had a party last week to prove that, which went horribly wrong. Not that I was shit, far from that, in fact, if I had actually had a chance to play for just 30 minutes, I would've blew minds away, but there was no electricity in the venue, and add to the mix when the party was switched to an outdoor party, it started to rain. Will I get another chance? Probably not. Will I quit, and just stick to mixing in my bedroom? Fuck no. I'm not a quitter, Ii;ll keep trying, even though I completely refuse to be social and that's actually the most essential aspect to success, I'll start YouTube videos, and then I can play the music I like to people who like the same music. I'm not a quitter. My business exam is also a few days away. I'm not studying well, and today the flu struck quite heavily, but at this point, I'm more concerned about finishing exams than the actual exam. It's one paper, and I can't wait to be done with it. Material is running out. This is getting a little repetitive, me ranting about DJ'ing. Now I must follow it up with something interesting. I had something in mind last night, it was interesting but the problem is I don't remember what it is. Well here's the follow up, and its more of a controversial issue (since when are any of my posts not controversial). A friend of mine sent me a picture earlier and she was reading a book on how men think, or how their mind works or something. Not any man, but particularly your husband/fiance/boyfriend or whatever your significant other might be. Well, here's the deal. Men are pretty simple, and I know one guy pretty well, and that's myself, so basically, from my own self observation, and I'll try to be as non biased as possible, I'll try to give a fair evaluation. Basically, as a guy, I want success, fun (all the guys stuff), attention, and satisfaction. It's simple. Success is something my female mate at whichever point of my life isn't based on her, but what I want ,is support, Like for example, of course I'd expect a girl to support me in school and stuff, but then even if I have a hobby, and even a dream, as crazy as mine is, take DJ'ing for example, I'd expect her to support me, not through just telling I'm good, but even if I'm not, helping me get better. Fun is just a girl who's fun, be funny, acknowledge what he finds entertaining, whether sports, gaming, or whatever, just acknowledge that and have a positive vibe on him. As for attention, it's a major issue, always give men attention. We love that, and avoid giving attention to other guys, major drawback. As for satisfaction, I'm 16, but yeah, you get the point there. Whatever level your relationship might be, judge appropriately and act. I don't know, its simple stuff. I hope I made today's blog interesting. I had to attempt to make something out of nothing. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-89198970507321367692014-05-29T16:59:00.002+03:002014-05-29T16:59:30.515+03:00Day 55: Pravda <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I have a business paper in four days and I'm </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">quite amazed at how irresponsible I am at the moment. I'm typing up a blog instead, but I choose to blame the schedule for giving me a 10 day gap to study for one paper which completely rendered me inefficient, and I'm basically in Summer and vacation mode. Proof? Yesterday's wild night cruise. That was too much adrenaline for one night. Okay so basically, I decided as of lately for a couple of nights, to sort of "borrow" the house's car and take it for a midnight cruise with my friends. First night was legit, I was scared, could barely drive, but I imagined. Everyone was surprised I actually had the balls to do it. Second night was even more better as I started getting comfortable. Last night however, things took an interesting turn on more than one occasion. To begin with, as soon as I left the house, I decided to run into a cop checkpoint, and I was stopped. My voice was slightly shaking, my legs were shivering. I don't have a license, a cop in a bad mood simply meant trouble. To my luck, I had a learner's permit, which ironically wasn't even complete and useless. Took it out, he looked at it, then asked for papers for the car. The car had billions of papers. I had to think fast, but for a person with what once was a successful blog which he is now attempting to rejuvenate, persuasion wasn't a problem. I simply told him that I don't often drive this car, and had no clue where they were. It was a stunt. But it worked, I was off. Perfect so far. We had two cars, mine, and a friends. We were about roughly around 8 people. Well basically my friend's car decided to stop working, and the burden was on me to get everyone who lived in different corners of the city home, and get back home in time before my mom wakes up. I pulled it off, although through driving which made Fast and Furious races look like nothing. It might seem a bit boring on a paper, but believe, adrenaline was gushing through my blood vessels the entire night. Okay, so I'm sorry if I bored with this story. It was interesting for me, at least. I know you expected to indirectly insult people and call them hypocrites, even though you probably think I'm the biggest hypocrite here. With summer coming up however, I am running out of material. I'm also a bit sick at the moment, but I'll remain committed and attempt to post almost everyday. I shall go and attempt to be a bit productive. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-9134143008787537822014-05-28T15:02:00.003+03:002014-05-28T15:07:22.113+03:00Day 54: Graduate?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3jQXtBtfxxVe9VCX5q1iejDIQ2QGNf54shRfOAw-icRo3BFrnXLGbAGXB8rjkRHFyisCK3_0jUVRR0jedFptFmno5CNTWgxUQmfcpZgZDUrXyMPP5-wDKWFDGx1lSL164ngCD2OrjvEvG/s1600/graduation-quote-by-zucker-03.gif" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3jQXtBtfxxVe9VCX5q1iejDIQ2QGNf54shRfOAw-icRo3BFrnXLGbAGXB8rjkRHFyisCK3_0jUVRR0jedFptFmno5CNTWgxUQmfcpZgZDUrXyMPP5-wDKWFDGx1lSL164ngCD2OrjvEvG/s1600/graduation-quote-by-zucker-03.gif" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well first and foremost, I'm back. Tell your friends cause the occasional ranting you can relate to is back, making fun of my lifestyle, which is slightly ironic, talking about girls I "love", wrong choices, and me claiming I have morals, the usual. No, but seriously, I enjoyed the views cause at the moment DJ'ing isn't going great cause I took this whole year off and everyone forgot that I ever had a career or a mixer twice the size of most DJ's here. Okay yes you can be the shittiest DJ ever and own the best set, but it's still important what decks your using. Most people reading this don't know much about DJ'ing, but its sort of like me having a dick twice the size of the other people, and then for example, someone with a smaller male reproductive </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">organ</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> claiming he's better at sex, which is a possibility, but then sort of funny, and must mean I'm really shit for that to happen (which I hope I'm not). That didn't make sense, but what I wanted to say is that I enjoyed feeling I'm actually good at something, even if its feminine and made me come off as a 15 year old girl on her period, and I'm actually better in other stuff but don't get the recognition I believe I deserve. There's a change in me between my last post in September and now, I'm a high school graduate. The graduation is before the actual exam. Results are in August. I personally believe the graduation ceremony should be after the results, but I mean, there's a lot of external factors so that's obviously a no can do. I still have a business paper on the second of June, but it's merely a paper and I have a 10 day </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: center;">gap</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> so I decided to horribly time my comeback in a time where some people have countless papers remaining. How'd I do? Worst than mocks in my opinion, but I'm just hoping it's enough for me to pull through and grant me entrance into one of my 3 options: University of Khartoum, the oldest, highly respected university. UMST, the prestigious if that's the word, or even a ticket to America even if that means a couple foundation years and almost a more than a 10th of the average human life span in university. So staying in Sudan obviously saves me a few valuable years before I get to have The Sudanese Dream of marrying a girl who was secretly a slut when younger</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(not that I'm saying all girls are)</span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">, only to have her drain me financially, force me to interact with her family which is probably obnoxious, and live a boring life compromised of occasional budget vacations to non exotic locations. Glad to see I'm hostile and on attack mode on the day I'm back. I may be completely done with my high school experience in exactly 5 days, but I haven't changed, I'm simply maturing very slowly. I also refuse to associate myself with most people. No, I don't think I'm better than them. It may come off as that, it's just that, I prefer to keep my circles extremely tight, and now that high school is done, I will avoid interaction. Large parties I will attend, but probably nothing more. They're not my scene. I mean, it's always the same thing. There's some people that are drunk, one of the girls will probably start crying and the others will attempt comforting her whilst intoxicated. The drunk guys who just want to stick they're tongue down the first throat they see. The clique in a corner judging them and calling them sluts. The guys in another corner who are just acting like they're thugs. The other group of girls, well who, to be honest, really do anything. The girl I may potentially have set my eyes on or have a thing with hitting it off with some other guy, and occasionally eyeing me out of the corner of her eye. There's my friends, well who to be honest, are just checking girls out and complaining about how shit this place and want to leave. There's me, who's wondering how I even ended up here and wasted my day. Sums up high school for you. So really not my scene. I know I'm coming off as cocky, but I'm just really not social. Which is a problem since I want to DJ and that's to be honest, more based on the amount of people you know rather than how good you actually are. In the end though, it is what it is. Cheers to the most memorable years of my life so far, the worst and the best of times. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span><br />
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-53203237165571577392013-09-15T11:46:00.001+03:002013-09-15T11:46:59.513+03:00Day 53: A Summer Bromance <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 53:</span> <span style="color: blue;">A Summer Bromance</span> </span></h2>
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<a href="http://www.lushquotes.com/pics/leo-durocher/Nice-guys-finish-last..jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="181" src="http://www.lushquotes.com/pics/leo-durocher/Nice-guys-finish-last..jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I type this before I jump into a math chapter of graphs I barely know anything about. God knows how I'll pass IG's. The amount of pressure is unbearable. Here's a nice fact about me. I guess how my week is going to be based on football results on the weekend. And, yesterday, Chelsea lost. Far from a good sign. Add to that the fact that every team I hate won. I'm highly superstitious when it comes to things like this. The fact that I have a lot of things taking this place is far from comforting too. Math test tomorrow, religion test on Tuesday, chemistry test on Wednesday, and a history report due God knows when. Parent's evening on Wednesday or something too. I mean this situation can't get any worse. The thing is, I never have time to "just study". I do, but it's not enough. For example, I just woke up around 30 minutes ago. I need at least half an hour to get myself properly functioning. By the time I ate something and freshened up for my day, it'll be around 11:45. Assume I have two hours of homework. By the time I'm done it's around 2. I have 3 hours and a half to study. I have to get a million things I barely understand perfectly in my mind by that time. Around 5, I leave for a lesson and by the time I'm back, it's 9, and my mind has had so many things thrown at it, it just simply closes off, I'm fatigued, and by 10, I probably fall asleep in my clothes without even noticing. The daily life of an IG candidate. I barely interact with people anymore. I mean it's not just my weekends that these lessons have ruined, but notice in that schedule, I don't even have time to just watch TV. Listen to music, text a few friends. I've been horrible at keeping in touch lately, and if you're one of those people I used to talk on a daily basis, my deepest apologies, don't blame me, blame the IG life. The past week hasn't been very productive educationally. Every time I decide to study, I fall asleep (I think my mind does it on purpose). Countless doses of caffeine don't work anymore, as if my body has developed some type of biological immunity to it. But then again, it hasn't been completely unproductive when it comes to things such as pointless girls and friends drama (then again, when do I ever get a break from shit like that). I was nothing more than a crush. Those words were said recently and damn did they finally bring some logic into some of this shit. I'm nothing more than the crush kind of guy you feel me? I mean I'll be super kind and a girl will take if for flirting, while acknowledging the fact that I probably say similar things to every girl I talk to, which is true, I am sadly, the nice guy person who won't ever put you down. I'm not hideous (at least I hope not). I'm immature and will occasionally make sexual jokes and push my limits thus offending a female, and then apologizing in some emotional way which makes me come of as I don't know, something. But add to the mix the fact that at times I turn into some philosophical character and say shit which could be quite impressive. I'll make forever alone and internet jokes. I mean the list of things I do does seem to go on. And to some girl that's really "cute". Boom! Next day I'm in my philosophical or whatever mood, play with words and make her admit slight emotions (even if it's just attraction), push things up a level, date for a few months, and then she figures, I was nothing more than a crush driven by the major lust females have but deny. When that happens, I get ignored for a month (majorly uncalled for ironic yet funny remark, well at least to me), get a text out of the blue when absolutely everything is going fine (another ironic remark), or yeah, you get what I mean. I'm easily attached therefore I can't do much about it, I get a text with the usual "it wasn't you, it was me" speech stolen off some cheesy and extremely popular dramatic TV show, and I'm back to how things were. Add to the mix that it barely takes me any time to get over someone no matter how attached I am. Give it a week, and I'm cracking jokes about the billions of flaws I missed the whole time! I usually blame myself for things, like hey, I never should have done that, or said that. That's the reason. Everyone agrees to it. But no. It's never something I did. It's simply who I am. I am blabbing on so I'll pause myself. Just for the record, I get it's not right for me to classify myself as whatever I just classified myself as, but then again, not like someone else has a blog about me, so I'll just speak from unbiased and real perspective as much as I can. I really wanted to talk about something more important considering I put things like that on hold. The community I'm in based on hypocrisy is killing me. I'll leave that to the next post though, and sincerest apologies for my uncalled for remarks. I'm an sarcastic asshole, one of the traits that make me fall in love with myself. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-67882809391414750922013-09-08T13:23:00.000+03:002013-09-08T13:23:07.805+03:00Day 52: Bagpipes From Baghdad <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 52:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Bagpipes From Baghdad</span></span></h2>
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<a href="http://todays-quotes.com/wp-content/uploads/quotes/Quotes-about-respect.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://todays-quotes.com/wp-content/uploads/quotes/Quotes-about-respect.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I type this blog while listening to some Santana, meaning I'm in somewhat of a positive mood. There's so much I want to talk about today. I was reading the post of one of my friends, and she was on point with something I could highly relate to. I'm a prefect. Same kind as the one's in Harry Potter or whatever, if you go to the typical third world school, Google what it is, I'm not going to explain what a prefect is. I mean she's head girl which is a much larger responsibility. But even though, I still have to a do a few things every now and then that a typical student wouldn't do. Some of these things require respect from other students. That's the problem, I barely get any. What am I going to do? Snitch? Throw a punch? Obviously not. There's no solution. It's overrated. The only perk is that at times, well actually rarely, I get to show up 5 minutes late or something. Other than that, whenever I do something wrong or mess around (which is a lot), I get this whole lecture from teachers over how I'm a prefect and should set an example. Set an example? Do you not know this school? All these children are a bunch of immature, stuck up brats. I mean I'm included at times, but they just take it to a whole new level. I sincerely wish anyone who has no sense of respect and wants to appear cool nothing but suffering. You truly don't deserve anything you were blessed with. Ignorant cunts. In addition, there's this kid who is like 5 years younger than me thinking he can push me around. It's funny because the only reason I stay quiet is that I know it's not the kid. I mean he's a kid, but he knows I at any given moment can just slap him. What I've noticed is that that's exactly what they want me to do. They, not him. Someone wants me to lose my nerve, do that, and then use that as an excuse to come after me. Might as well give them what they want. This will probably in some sort of physical confrontation, which I always tried to avoid. But it's been what, 5 years since I got in some decent fight. Plus I was daredevil child, short back then, but I was always able to whoop ass pretty badly. Not cause I was strong, but I guess it was just instinctive. I hit quick, far from hard since I'm not well built, but did damage and could majorly take some. Let's hope I still got that. I hate when I'm forced into things like this, but fuck it, I won't be pushed around by some hypocrite cunts. I just hate how the society I live in is built on fear, not respect. Ironically, with all due respect, and not fear, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-83377258801582813562013-09-06T12:36:00.000+03:002013-09-06T12:36:45.842+03:00Day 51: Where's The Drum and Bass? <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 51:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Where's The Drum and Bass? <div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Seems like I'm committing well at the moment! (Note the sarcasm) By this post I probably would've hit 4,000. I suffer from lack of material at the moment. I mean to be honest, I tried posting the day after my previous post, and I had nothing good to talk about. What do I blame? Without a doubt the whole IGCSE situation. It basically has killed off all my priorities and concerns. I mean I spend an extra 15 hours a day (so that's technically two school days) in night lessons. Add it and it's like going to school all week basically. The one day which I can go out, I have a lesson on that finishes at 9 on. I also have to be home before midnight. So I basically have 3 hours which I'm allowed to have somewhat of a social life on. I mean I don't spend my whole day studying. Matter of fact, I haven't studied anything like for the sake of studying yet. I just do my homework and all and use that as my form of studying. I was never good with straight up exams and all that, but this is a life changing one, so I'll make sure I don't mess this one up. So yesterday was the weekend! Was an okay day, would've been really good if the place wasn't crowded. I just have an issue when I know too many people at one place, and there's just no space in general. I usually can't sort the place out, nor do I feel comfortable. I was in a good mood though, so that's ironic judging on the amounts of people that came. I mean that's my lack of material right there, no dramatic stories which everyone wants, nothing major coming up. My life is pretty much at a stead hold moment. Nothing really happening. I'll focus on school, my future, and that's it. Not like I have time for anything else. And to be honest, not like I need anything getting in the way of that. With all due respect, Fiasco out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-79333594651421857402013-09-01T11:17:00.000+03:002013-09-01T11:17:55.964+03:00Day 50: Bolly Will Take Medusa!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 50:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Bolly Will Take Medusa!</span></span></h2>
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<a href="http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lt6wd8CrWL1qdrrv6o1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="160" src="http://31.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lt6wd8CrWL1qdrrv6o1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Day 50! It's finally here! I'd just like to propose a toast at the moment. Firstly, I'd like to thank Acer for producing the laptop through which I type, Zain for providing the internet which I use, </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">and lastly my readers. I'm just attempting to be funny. It's Day 50, and I honestly don't expect more than 50 views on my page, but astonishingly, you all have me just a tad away from 4,000 which we'll hit in a day or two. So thank you all. I may not know you, but I feel like if you're reading this, we're family. And we've grown together through this journey, and soon enough, we'll be on Day 100! I haven't posted in a while. I'm an IG candidate with my whole life ahead of me, so it's a bit tough finding time to post. I will try my best though, at times I'll post almost daily, and at other times, I barely will, so please bare with me. Let's see? Damn I have a lot to talk about. Okay, so this is awkward considering up to Day 40 or so I was bragging about how awesome my relationship is. Punch line is, I'm single (willing to mingle for all the lovely ladies reading this). Why, who, what, when, where, and how? I'm just as clueless as you are about it! It's funny though. I promise you I am grinning like crazy while I type this up at the irony of the situation. I mean I want to provide a story, but I don't even know what the story is. I'm impressed by the way I'm dealing with it all though. I mean isn't life priceless. I've always been criticized for sharing too much of my personal life. But I mean no one can really use it against me considering I don't care much about my social life. Whether it shoots through the roof, or it's the worst in the school's, I couldn't care less. I guess I just let people know too much about me. But I think that's what makes me special. I don't hide much, I mean everyone has their secrets, and I'm no different. I share a lot, but you'd be surprised the things no one knows. Let's just keep it at that. I mean if I didn't share a bit too much I wouldn't have a decently successful blog. It's been forever since I posted. There really hasn't been much to talk about. There was never was, I just basically over do everything I say and make it seem interesting and something you can relate to. Something interesting that happened is we had to write a two page modern version of a fairy tale for English. I chose to write a modernized version of Cinderella. Basic summary of the summary is she's a cashier at fast food restaurant. She's a foster girl, but instead of giving her an evil step mother, I just made her a girl out of the foster system which she hates. The two evil step sisters are two models who share her apartment and pay a much larger share of the rent, therefore they pick on her and she stays quite. One day the to bitches go to a party, of the rich teen gentleman figure of the city and she's not invited. Fairy God Mother pops in, does her usual speech, convinces her to go the party. The rich gentleman guy ends up with her all night, she tells him her story, says she has to leave by midnight. He holds her, her dress and make up disappears and he kisses her! (Woo!) Okay, so I didn't want to share my story to impress you. The thing about it, it was written in the first person perspective from Cinderella's view. I had to sound, think, and act like a girl. So I chose my blogging tone, which being honest does sound like a girl (Not something I'm proud of). So I ended up scoring the highest in my class on that. Comforting ain't it? Only time I achieve something is when I'm sounding like a girl. And on that bombshell it's time to end today's post. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span><br />
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-16415191777657489522013-08-14T14:36:00.000+03:002013-08-14T14:36:56.210+03:00Day 49: Go Figure <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 49: </span><span style="color: blue;">Go Figure</span></span></h2>
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<a href="http://pics.greetingskit.com/wp-content/uploads/00-great-friends-quotes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="248" src="http://pics.greetingskit.com/wp-content/uploads/00-great-friends-quotes.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well yesterday was certainly the day. In such a good mood that as I'm typing this up I feel my fingers jump with the beat of the song as if I'm playing a piano. That's the beauty of house music. I'm not rapping along to how many bitches I have or singing until my throat hurts. Jump simply moving my fingers to the beat. Hell, I feel my soul move to the beat! That was deep, so deep I can't even see myself right now. Deadmau5- Strobe (AutoLaser Remix). That's the song, just for the those who might consider checking it out. Well let's jump into the good stuff. Yesterday I met up with some friends. The thing is, we don't go to the same school. So unlike most of my people's gatherings, it's not full of gossip about how much they hate other cliques. I mean, won't be a hypocrite, I join in on those conversations as well, but having lots of random topics just flow along, was just beautiful. Like I certainly felt the vibe hit me yesterday. It's not everyday you run into people who can just naturally hit you with a positive vibe, and maybe the reason why I've had such a rough time a while back is because I was blocking that vibe. So basically, no whining today, no complaining, and certainly no subliminal messages to anyone. Today is just me acknowledging the few people who recently walked into my life and made a lot better. I mean I don't mention names but I'm sure they'll pick themselves out. There's this one girl, I can trust with my life. Like if I have any issue, she's always there. Yesterday certainly missed her, but hell, it's not everyday you find someone who you know you can trust, and in my case, I barely trust anyone, so I feel blessed to have run into her. Someone who you don't even need to tell something is wrong. They can pick your mood out through just a text. Then there's this one girl, who can light up your day with a call. I don't know if she knows it, but her smile just lights up the whole room. We've been growing closer day by day. The conversations I had with her yesterday, the laughs, what more could ask for? Her vibe is just so positive, it can probably turn the night to day. She's that one of kind person, that you'll arguably meet once in a lifetime. I could go on forever, and there's plenty of other people I met recently, but these two certainly are the ones who stand out at the moment. Apologies if I left anyone out who believes they deserve to be included, you probably do, but my posts are long enough as they are. So as of know, confidence level is still on infinite, still plenty of Arrow episodes to watch, great friends as I stated earlier, vibe is positive, DJ skills sharpening up even more as I'm starting to mix a bit of rock into my house, things are only getting better. I'm content, hell, I'm happy with my life right now. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-5189228906024001862013-08-13T00:44:00.000+03:002013-08-13T00:44:01.036+03:00Day 48: Fist Pumped The Pain Away <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 48:</span> <span style="color: blue;">Fist Pumped The Pain Away </span></span></h2>
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<a href="http://31.media.tumblr.com/7257a9051bd8d6d2759b0b0658edaeef/tumblr_mnzypkKrAV1r1t3fio1_500.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="256" src="http://31.media.tumblr.com/7257a9051bd8d6d2759b0b0658edaeef/tumblr_mnzypkKrAV1r1t3fio1_500.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm starting to think I can seriously be diagnosed with bipolarity. Yesterday I was whining like a </span><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">little bitch about a problem. Today? Watched countless episodes of Arrow (which is the best series created in the history of all TV shows known to man). Been working on music, on a rate where I download 2+ GB of music a day for the past 4 days, of every genre you can think off (except metal, hate that shit). 3 party worthy bootlegs a day. I've really been doing all I can to step up my game. Just wish I did it a bit earlier than the year I'm an IGCSE candidate. Keep in mind that I said I'm not going to be an official DJ for any party. That doesn't mean I won't show up, feature, possibly throw in a few playlists to who need them. I just won't go through the stress of planning out a party, preparing, and procedures of a party. I won't have time for all that. Yesterday, I won't lie, I had somewhat of an emotional and mental breakdown. Called one of my friends, had him over, talked it out, took some pain killers (not in an I'm an American middle age mom who's addicted to them) kind of way. They just calm me down. That made me sound like an addict. I barely take them, I don't want my social accounts and rumors tomorrow cause of a remark I made without noticing. So yeah, the mental breakdown I had yesterday was cause of the problem I posted about. It's a problem worth worrying about, one that's out of my power and in someone else's hand after I did all I could. I honestly feel pathetic, letting myself have a mental breakdown over an individual. Shows me how vulnerable I made myself. When I haven't even done something notably wrong that I'm aware of, and even if I did, not even worth being told I did something wrong. So to conclude that issue, I've made that problem a priority of mine for too long, had it nearly ruin my vacation, lose my confidence for quite a while, enter a major depression period and even have a mental breakdown over. All over nothing. I can't keep trying to force something that's two sided into one. I feel as if I'm talking to a brick wall. I'm done humiliating myself. I shouldn't keep killing myself mentally over someone who makes me feel worthless, because even if it seems like I'm worth nothing to someone at the moment, I'm worth something to a lot of people. Worth the world to some. And let's not forget, also a charmer! (Wink, wink) My confidence level has been up, my DJ skills have been majorly sharpening, and after finally getting my mind straight, rearranging my priorities for the time being. Until that problem turns from a problem over nothing to something, its far from priority. Funny right? I make it seem as if it was someone else who posted yesterday. But like I said, I've matured. Not fully as I've noted yesterday, but enough to know I decide my happiness and well being, and nothing else. I've got new killer tracks, major bootlegs, planning on making hour long pop mash-ups (Not electronic, but pop, as in something that everyone loves). They'll step into tracks from The Caribbean tropical islands, killer hip hop tracks, hottest Ibiza club hits, and even slow jam tracks for all those couples and people who like spicing things up! It's something that'll take a while so please bare with me. School's next week. Not looking forward to that. School's just overrated, and there's too many people who just disgust me. If you're reading this, you're probably not one of them! On the contrary, I'm glad I got my sanity back after a sleepless night followed by a day where I had a mental breakdown. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3969672822606364675.post-22631659669101669192013-08-11T22:17:00.000+03:002013-08-11T22:23:54.316+03:00Day 47: How Can I Dance the Pain Away? <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Day 47:</span><span style="color: blue;"> How Can I Dance the Pain Away? </span></span></h2>
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<a href="http://favim.com/orig/201105/15/hurt-mfrases-nian-pain-pretend-quote-Favim.com-45281.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="212" src="http://favim.com/orig/201105/15/hurt-mfrases-nian-pain-pretend-quote-Favim.com-45281.jpg" width="320" /></a><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Well I'm officially back to blogging. Before I jump into anything. Malaysia was beautiful. It was an opportunity to run away, and I took it. Well let's jump to something. I'm not there anymore, and remember how I said I can take a lot more punches and blows? Well, I've been proven right. I wish I wasn't. Being stronger just means one thing, I'm going to be able to deal with much more. That much more is directly proportional to the pain it brings. I just wish I was back in Malaysia. The thing is, I don't know if I'm a drama queen or not. Well if I wasn't, would I have a popular blog? So many things contradict. I usually sleep around midnight. I stayed up until around 6 AM last night just thinking, playing music. I have this thing I do called musical therapy. I basically start with sad songs, and go more positive. I eventually end up feeling great. Didn't work last night, for the first time in years. The thing is, I just wish I could directly just yell out my problems here or something. No escape, no one to tell, nothing. It's really one thing that's getting to me. Honestly, fuck the rest for all I care. Like I usually play mind games on people, but this time, I've fallen for this sick endless mind game myself is playing on me. It's ironic how you can allow someone just kill you emotionally without even doing anything. That's the worse kind of pain. It feels much better when they do something, but fuck, when the reason is that they're doing nothing at all, and that's killing you. It makes you feel pathetic, worthless, weak, stupid, you name every damn kind of negative thing you can feel, and you feel them. You have no one but yourself to blame. When they do something, it's like at least they went through the effort, but when there's nothing, and that's what's hurting you, it can't get worse than that. Add onto that when you try, and get nothing in return. Apart from all those negative people, you feel humiliated. You allow yourself to be in this state. Yet from everything you've seen, it doesn't seem like that someone, or fuck it, anyone cares. You tell your close friends. They end up giving you some shitty advice about how you should stop caring. Seriously? Do you think you should get some award for that. Here's a dose of reality, don't you think I would if I could. What's even better is when they tell you try after being humiliated. How? One friend said blog it, it could make you feel better, hell, if you're lucky get positive results. I doubt that. I have a much higher chance of getting negative results, and possibly give off what this is about which I don't want.( Anyone who decently knows me could probably tell, but I'll probably deny if they ask me anyways). But hell, even if the results are negative, at least I'm getting results. It usually ends up with these few friends shrugging it off and talking about how I don't deserve this and all that. (I know, I don't!) The pain majorly out weighs the pride. But I don't know if that's enough to make me lose it. I don't even know what to say anymore. With all due respect, Fiasco Out. </span></div>
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Fiascohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11191009417298703985noreply@blogger.com0